Clean, family friendly, office safe humor

Late exams won’t be accepted

It was the final examination for an introductory English course at the UW. Like many such freshman courses, it was designed to weed out new students, having over 800 students in the class! The examination was two-hours long, and standard blue exam booklets were provided. The professor was very strict and told the class that any exam that was not on his desk in exactly two hours would not be accepted and the student would fail.

A half hour into the exam, a student came rushing in and asked the professor for an exam booklet. “You’re not going to have time to finish this,” the professor said, as he handed the student a booklet.

“Yes I will,” replied the student. He then took a seat and began writing.

After two hours, the professor called for the exams, and the students filed up and handed them in. All except for the late student, who continued writing. Half an hour later, the last student came up to the front of the lecture hall where the professor was sitting behind the desk, casually reading a book with his feet up on a stool. He attempted to put his exam on the stack of exam booklets already there.

“No you don’t, I’m not going to accept that. It’s late,” the professor said, turning the page in his book.

The student looked incredulous and angry. “Do you know who I am?”

“Nooooo, as a matter of fact, I don’t,” replied the professor with an air of sarcasm in his voice.

“Do you KNOW who I AM?” the student asked again, poking his own chest with his finger as he leaned intimidatingly over the table.

“No, and I don’t care.” replied the professor with an air of superiority.

The student quickly lifted the stack of completed exams and stuffed his in the middle. “Good!” he said and walked out of the room.

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